You let your dog out and he hasn’t come back in yet. You look for him. A tree near his dog house has the word “Rovertoa” carved in it.
When presented with two women arguing over a child, King Solomon declared they cut it in half. Truth is, he just liked cutting kids in half.
Lifehack: Eat the flesh of the goat. Dream strange dreams.
For further information on any topics we’ve discussed, please check the Forbidden Knowledge section of your home that you never noticed.
Wash yourself in the blood of heathen gods. Hear their commands. Await their movements. Oh, yuck, not those movements. You have a sick mind.
You cannot get blood from a stone. You can, however, get phlegm from petrified wood.
Hey there. I am at DragonCon this year. If you wish to summon me, smear blood on your room key. Or email me. firstname.lastname@example.org
The dame walked in. She was all legs. Dozens of them. She was a centipede.
Lifehack: Get kicked out of a grocery store for pretending that it’s The Mist outside.
Illness is just the body’s way of saying that, yes, that milk was definitely expired.
Breaking news: Biblical translations found to be inaccurate. Manatees actually made in God’s image, not man.
Fact: There ain’t no party like an other-dimensional party because there’s no guarantee time and physics work the same there.